Thursday, December 10, 2015

THIS JUST IN! Donald Trump’s Campaign Slogan is: “I’ve Got a Big Dick!” (by anon)

Donald Trump is changing his campaign slogan from “Make America Great Again” to “I’ve Got a Big Dick!”  Ok, not really. But semi-believable, right??  Are you really shocked that I would write that as a possibility?  With all his hyper-self-promoting-pandering-to-the-masses rambling bullshit, nothing is off the table.  Here are some other possible campaign slogans that wouldn’t surprise me:

“Me Me Me”
“I’m white and damn proud of it!”
“Let me show you my money”
“I’m hired!”
“I’m an asshole and you love me for it!”

[Full disclosure: I’m feeling absolutely sick to my stomach writing a post about Donald Trump and his presidential run. I’m throwing up. not joking]

I’m absolutely baffled as to why ANYONE takes this buffoon seriously.  Here are just some highlights of his idiocy from both his current and previous runs for president:

a. He promises to use swear words when negotiating with foreign countries.
b. He’ll serve McDonald’s at state dinners for those countries he feels are being unfair to the US.
c. Trump credits China for coming up with the concept of global warming to fight US manufacturing.
d. He accuses Mexico for deliberately sending over rapists and killers to the US.
e. He championed birtherism against Obama (and still does).
f. He freely calls all our nation’s leaders (and everyone else) “stupid.”
g. He claims that his activity of renting and selling properties counts for more than enough foreign policy experience.
h. Trump affirms that if his policies on immigration were implemented, he would have stopped 9/11.
i. He wants to prevent all muslims from entering the US.
j. Trump has called numerous women “fat pigs,” “dogs,” “bimbos,” “slobs,” and “disgusting animals.”

Points d, e, and i are just covert ways of being racist.  A while back, Bob Schieffer of CBS’ Face the Nation said that Trump’s suspicion over Obama getting into Columbia University is “just code for saying he got into law school because he’s black.  This is an ugly strain of racism that’s running through this whole thing.”  Right on Bob!!  Call it like it is.

But why does this racist goof get any traction!  Is our nation that racist?  I guess so.  Is our nation that stupid to pay attention to this crap?  Yup.  Is our nation that fascinated by pontificating, immature, shit-faced egomaniacs?  Of course it is!  Remember Charlie Sheen!?  There was a media blitz around his own on-air self-destruction a few years back.  BUT everyone saw Sheen as precisely what he is – an egomaniac with extreme delusions about himself.  So why does Trump get traction where Sheen just slides out of the spotlight??

Let me repeat for the sake of emphasis.  Donald Trump and Charlie Sheen are practically the same person – meat heads, with lots of money, big mouths, and ideas fit for a donkey’s ass.  But Sheen was ridiculed and rightly so.  Why isn’t Trump?  Is it because of his racism adored by so many Americans?  Is it that Trump packages himself together just a little bit better than Sheen?  Is it because Trump links himself with a presidential run and the other Republican hopefuls are just that pathetic?  Granted, many people do not take Trump seriously and they do lump him into the same category as Charlie Sheen.  But there are many others who really do esteem Trump and think that he would be a great president! <holy shit, just kill me>  How is it even possible that this is a serious possibility???

Donald Trump embodies almost everything wrong with this country.  He’s an arrogant, cut throat capitalist, sexist, egotistic, ignorant, racist, man-whore, double-shit who makes his living off of financially screwing other people.  The more this guy gets into the spotlight as someone we should care about listening to, the more we should be punching ourselves in the faces.  Someone should punch me now for even writing a post about him.

“I’ve Got a Big Dick!”  It wouldn’t surprise me one bit if he ran on that.  Hell, I bet he’d even make Charlie Sheen his VP.

1 comment:

  1. This is a possibility because he markets himself as someone who "isn't a politician," which is basically brilliant because he is playing on the fact that most people in our country are damn sick of all of them. He also promotes almost daily how he is self-funding his campaign, so he won't pull any of the bullshit that other people pull because they have to please the people funding their campaign.

    In addition to this... most people in this country have the American flag shoved so far up their asses that when someone who is running for president says "I will tell every other country to go fuck themselves, because YAY America," everyone has an eargasm and is automatically on board with whatever he says.

    With so many stupid people living in America, I think it makes perfect sense that someone who represents this stupidity so accurately has finally made it into the running and has gained so much support...